Divorce negotiations are delicate and require all the warmth and sincerity we can convey. Face-to-face conversations offer the best opportunity for both parties to truly hear each other.

Communication experts believe that our words convey only 10% of what we say, with the remaining 90% communicated through body language, eye contact, facial expressions, and voice inflections. These elements are our best persuasion tools, and it’s unwise not to use them whenever possible.

Why Face-to-Face Matters

  • Body Language: Non-verbal cues like gestures and posture play a significant role in communication.
  • Eye Contact: Helps build trust and understanding.
  • Facial Expressions: Convey emotions that words alone cannot.
  • Voice Inflections: Tone and pitch add context and clarity.

The Pitfalls of E-Mail, Texting, and Telephone

  • E-Mail and Texting: Comparable to sending a telegram; they lack emotional context.
  • Telephone: While it allows for vocal tone variations, it misses critical visual cues.

If Telephone is the Only Option

  • Be as upbeat as possible.
  • Schedule calls for times when both parties are typically less stressed and in a good mood.
  • Avoid negotiating on bad days or at inconvenient times.

Potential Issues

  • Misinterpretation: Without non-verbal cues, messages can easily be misunderstood.
  • Bravery Behind Screens: People may become bolder and meaner when not face-to-face, leading to unnecessary conflict.

E-mails and texts may start civilly but can quickly escalate into hostile messages. The convenience of these methods is not worth the potential for miscommunication and increased conflict.

For effective and sincere divorce negotiations, face-to-face communication is the best approach. Whenever possible, avoid e-mail, texting, and telephone negotiations to ensure a smoother and more amicable process.

We welcome hearing from you and we invite your questions. There is no obligation. No one will ever know that we spoke or what we discussed. Everything you say is privileged, confidential, and completely classified. We do not maintain a mailing list and will not contact you unless you ask us to.

Contacting us is easy!

Call 630-928-0600 

Email kc@illinoislegal.com

Click Here to submit a message through our contact form. 

If we are in court or in a meeting when you call, one of us will personally get back to you as quickly as possible. We are extremely discreet with callbacks and reply emails. Just leave your name and a secure email address or personal cell phone number.

Kari and Richard are staunch advocates of the non-court approach to divorce, and are also active and seasoned litigators with over 80 years of combined trial experience in the Illinois divorce courts of Cook and DuPage counties.