How to Convince Them That You Were Listening

  • Try to assume the most “listening” position you can. Uncross your hands and legs, sit up straight, face the speaker, and lean forward.
  • Always maintain eye contact while listening. To do otherwise is to communicate a lack of interest or disapproval.
  • Be careful of your facial expressions and body language when your spouse is speaking. They could register disapproval of what is being said.
  • Never, ever interrupt your partner when he/she is speaking.
  • Try to let your spouse speak more than you do.
  • When it is your spouse’s turn to speak, allow him/her to speak for at a minimum of 45 seconds straight. This establishes that you care about hearing their side.
  • When your spouse finishes speaking, do NOT answer immediately. Always wait at least three seconds before responding. This indicates that you were listening. A quick response indicates that you were not concentrating on their message.
  • Use caution not to anticipate what they will say next.