Many people are naturally overpowering when it comes to discussing who should get what in the divorce. Some of them qualify as “negotiation bullies.”
A “reasonable spouse” can at least begin to understand the other side’s settlement position, but negotiation bullies are totally unable to comprehend that there may be another way of seeing things.
They are too self-centered and “superior” to perceive an opposing settlement position as being anything but preposterous. And this is not an act – they actually believe it.
If your spouse is being a bully, save your breath, and hire a good lawyer to do the talking for you.
Never haggle with a bully, because they will beat you every time. If you dislike conflict and become tempted give in, leave the room. A bully knows his or her prey and knows more about your “weakness” than you do. They bank on it.
If you are about to say yes to a bully (and many of us do), be tough about one thing. Don’t say yes on the spot and Insist on getting a day or so to think it over.
If your spouse is not a bully but is just extremely competitive, resist trying to challenge them directly, and be diplomatic. If you stir up a competitor, you will have a semi-bully on your hands.